Monday, December 17, 2007

Fire in the Taco Bell!

I almost set my office on fire by sticking cookies+paper towel in the microwave and promptly forgetting about them. Apparently, gingersnaps are flammable. Who knew?

Luckily (*snort* what luck?), the large billows of smoke seeping out of the microwave gave me a small hint that something was wrong.

We have yet to tell if there is damage to the microwave. And our lungs. (Hey guys, I have no Workers Comp!...Would this even qualify, since it's kinda my fault?)

Now the entire 17th floor smells like burnt cinnamon and ginger. Or, as Kristen says, "smells like booty." Key phrase is not "entire office smells" but "entire fucking 17th floor." Oh, and our windows are bolted. Otis would appreciate that.

Sad thing is I did the exact same thing yesterday in a different microwave. Sighness.

And don't think that since the fire alarms didn't go off that I'm exaggerating. It's just a ghetto-ass building with a shitty ass security/safety system (More about wandering junkie psycho's later).

*Side-note: Did anyone ever tell you that burnt ginger-snaps from Trader Joes look like pigeon turd? Cuz they do.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

you know i didn't understand how this happened until you explained it to me some more...that's how impressive this is. it's beyond me..

morgan said...

IDEA: office arsenists club

we can exchange tips, like, next time use tin foil.

morgan said...

ps flu shot = a good idea. i'm supposed to get one because i work in a hospital with immunosuppressed cancer patients who could die if i shed a virus on them but i haven't. but you should.

Neil Biswas said...

to borrow from my role model and lifelong inspiration dwight schrute:

joe mccarthy, richard nixon, studebaker, television
north korea, south korea, marilyn monroe. . .
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lueRaOwFK0Q)

KAKI STARTED THE FIRE

Neil Biswas said...

since it's the holiday season, i'm feeling extra gracious today. . .


cookies in the microwave
huge clouds of smoke, almost gave
all the other office workers
emphysema

smells like booty everywhere
looks like pigeon crap i swear
the whole 17th floor looks like
hiroshima

ghetto ass fire alarm
shitty job preventing harm
LCBH nearly screwed
cuz kaki can't warm up food

kaki started the fire
it was never burning until her returning
kaki started the fire
it was never burning until her returning